The Reason for Tears


I haven’t cried this hard in a while.  A friend of mine posted on facebook today that her son would have been one month old today.  The past tense made me want to learn more and I found she had a photo album of their stillborn baby boy posted on facebook.  And my heart is broken.

I have never cried like this for another family or another need.  I’m still in tears as I’m writing this.  As a daddy, it hurts so bad just to think of what that must be like.  I can only imagine how I’d react since someone else’s story is getting to me this much.  I can’t control it.

And as I am weeping for their loss, I’m crying over my love for my own daughter.  She is a blessing and I think I’ve forgotten that.  My wife had a low chance of even being able to conceive.  Yet we have a 7 month old baby girl.  She’s fussy.  She’s a picky eater.  She’d rather whine than learn how to talk.  She doesn’t sleep well.  But I am so in love with her.  And seeing that photo album today broke my heart and allowed a new level of love to seep out into every part of me.

I am so thankful for my daughter.  I am so thankful that I’m a daddy.  I am so aware of the moments I’ve been taking for granted.  And I am so broken for my friends who lost their little boy.  The more I write the more I cry, but I had to tell this story. 

Kinsleigh‘s napping now.

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